Booze and Boys

Today's visit to the grocery store was, well, imaginative. Claudia assumed her position in the basket of the cart while Mallory occupied the front seat. Mid-trip, I was excited to discover my favorite wine on sale. I grabbed three bottles and placed them in the cart next to the fresh produce on which Claudia was making bite marks. Her attention immediately shifted to the bottles. She picked one up and started talking to it...nothing too unusual for her. As we were cruising through the cereal isle, I, along with other shoppers, noticed her hugging the bottle of wine. As long as she wasn't yelling, chucking items out of the cart or trying to jump, I didn't really care what she was doing. By the time we made it to the frozen foods section she had started kissing the bottle. We were definitely getting the stink-eye now. I finally made my way to the check-out line. When I grabbed "Claudia's" bottle of wine to place on the conveyor belt, she screamed, "HEY, don't take my boyfriend!!!"

I'm in trouble.